12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
