So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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