you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Randomize
