why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
