toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
She's the barista slut.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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