my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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