so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Randomize
