if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I think my moral compass just broke
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