Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
