how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
