You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
What did we do last night that was yellow?
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
