Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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