I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
