He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
