Whats the glycemic index on semen?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
