I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
