he looks like a really good dad on facebook
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Randomize
