he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
