she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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