You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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