The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize