I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
