he wants to bone in the snuggie
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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