So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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