Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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