so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
