i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
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