absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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