4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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