Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I skipped work to stalk him.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize