I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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