Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Randomize
