we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
