TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
How external is "for external use only"?
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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