I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
