She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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