You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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