Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
There r osticjed everywhere
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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