what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
party gras won. party gras always wins.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
