No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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