I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
