"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
