were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize