so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
