I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Im part way to drunk.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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