This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I enjoy the company of your penis
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
