he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
if i died would you start the facebook group?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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