You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize