took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
