she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
