I love black thongs
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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