she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
