Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
